Tarzan And Sex

The Joke "Tarzan And Sex" posted on under English Adult Jokes and viewed 30,872 times.

One Day Jane Met Tarzan In The Jungle.

She Was Very Attracted To Him And During Her Questions About His Life She Asked Him What He Did For Sex.

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What’s That?” He Asked.

She Explained To Him What Sex Was And He Said: “Oh, I Use A Hole In The Trunk Of A Tree.

Tarzan, You Have It All Wrong,” She Says Horrified, “But I Will Show You How To Do It Properly.

She Took Off Her Clothes, Laid Down On The Ground And Spread Her Legs Wide.

Here,” She Said, “You Must Put It In Here.

Tarzan Removed His Loincloth, Stepped Closer And Then Gave Her An Almighty Kick In The Crotch.

Jane Rolled Around In Agony. Eventually She Managed To Gasp, “What The Hell Did You Do That For?”

Just Checking For Bees,” Said Tarzan.

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Comments

60 Comments

  1. Rashii says:

    Hume angrezi samjh nhi aati hehehehe

    1. pankaj says:

      sorry rashi ji ye joke m nahi samjha sakta..hehehe

      1. Matrix says:

        aur samjhana bhi nhi. kya yaar tujhe achaa lagta hai kya is type ke jokes use samjhane :P

  2. Rashii says:

    Admin ji aapne hi to kaha tha jb tak ap hume msg nhi karege tb tak hum apko msg na kare :'(

    1. Admin says:

      Par mene to tumhe kal aur parso kiya

      1. Rashii says:

        Admin ji apke sms to hume mile hi nhi, kis k num per kr diye aapne sms :'(

        1. Admin says:

          tere hi number kiya thha ki mubarak ho padayi khatam hui :(

      2. Matrix says:

        lagta hai mobile walon ne admin ko thag liya hehe paise kaat liye pr msg nhi gaya. :P

  3. Rashii says:

    Jay dear to aj cmt karenge nhi unka offc bnd jo hain hehe
    thanx panchy ji
    matrix ji humare naal pange na lena hehe
    dhiraj ji hmm abhi tak naraj ho ap aur haan hume LETTER likhne k liye shukriya.
    Kapil ji doli tyarr hone me kafi time hain abhi

    Pyare dosto apki pyari dost rashii ki study khtm ho chuki hain isliye apko ab daily rashii k cmt jhelne paege hehe

    1. Matrix says:

      hehe tumse pange nhi lena hai yaar tumse darr lagta hai! :P

    2. Matrix says:

      tumse pange nhi lena hai yaar tumse darr lagta hai! :P

  4. Jay says:

    hehehe….Good Joke.
    Admin Bhai & Dear All Friends,
    Good Morning !!!!!!!!

  5. Jay says:

    Rashii dear, Good Morning!!!!!!!!!
    Dear Agar Aap humari DEAR ka Naam Janana hi chahati hai to Aapko Apni Email Id ya phir Fb ID deni hogi, Hum Aapko Msg me Apni Dear Ka Naam bata denge. Hum Yaha par uska Naam batakar Apni Dear ki Ruswayi Nahi karwana chahtey hai.

    1. Rashii says:

      Hum samjh sakte hain Jay dear, all the best bta dijiyega unhe ki ap unhe sbse jyda pyar karte ho

  6. Jay says:

    Hey Dhiraj!!
    Aaj Mai Apni dear se Apne Pyar ka ijahar karne jaa raha hun Kyuki_______
    Is se pahle chura le koi aur unke dil ko,
    Yeh soachkar hone lagi bachaini mere dil ko.
    Mai soya tha gahri nindo me kambakt dil ne Nindo se jaga diya hamko,
    Kahne laga “Jay” Aaj to hai Friday ab to ijahar kar do Apne Pyar ka unko.

    Aaj Shayad ye mera Last comments ho sakta hai. Agar Time mila to comment kar dunga nahi to Kal phir Milenge tab tak k liye gud by.

  7. Dhiraj says:

    maine to socha honeybee ki jagah saanmp niklega…hehe..fantastic nonveg joke…
    …………THIS IS 4 MY BOYFRIEND…..

    ..ae mere sapno rajkumar kanha par chhipa hai tu…
    ..tere liye meri raat mera din..mera chain sab tune chura liye..
    ..kya tu bhi mere liye issi tarah bechain hai..
    ..kya tujhe meri talash nahi..kya tujhme pyaar nahi..
    ..tere liye janha ki saari khushiya tod laoon..
    ..tujhse janha ki baate karni hai..pyaar k geet sunane hai..
    ..tera haath tham k..tujhe sunahri duniya mein le jana hai..
    ..teri dil ki har baato ko..dil se sunna chahta hoon main..
    ..tu iss duniya se darna mat..tere pyaar ki takat teri rakhsa karegi..
    ..tera pyaar hamesha tera saath dega…

    ur boyfriend

    Dhiraj.

  8. Kumar says:

    Sameer W2H close q hai, aur kab suru hoga. Plz tell me.

    1. Admin says:

      Kon hai bhai tu

  9. Vinu roxxx!!! says:

    Haha
    Hehe

  10. Samir says:

    Hi ALKA
    kaisi ho,yar tm sayri bahut achi krti ho,aur yar tm pankaj ki baton ko ignore kro,aur yar ish site pe 2 ya 3 boye aise hain jo girls pr bad word use nhi krte hain,,tm oun se dosti kr skti ho,,like,,,,WANTED,,,KAPIL,,,HEARTBEAT,ye sb tmhare ache frend bn skte hain,,aur ye sb girls se kafi respect se bat krte hain,,,aur rhi bat pankaj ki to tm ouse koi cmnt mt do ,agr ouske bad v pankaj tm pe bad word use krta h,,,,to fir mai hoon na,,,aur yar yehan hm sb only frends hain ishi liye 1 dusre se majak krte hain aur kuch nhi
    aur yar pankaj ab tu apna nanga tandav band kr,,aur tu ishe itna jalil mt kr ki ye site hi,chhor de
    kyun ki tu hd se jyada aage badh rha ha,,ab to tu samjh hi gya hoga

    JPR

    1. AKI ( Jaiswal ) says:

      sameer bhai sabse pahle to goodmorning , ek bat samj nhi ayi yar tu is alka ki itni tariif ku kar raha hai . site chorti hai to chor de .galti iski hi hai pankaj ne isse sirf iska hal pucha tha na ki iske sath flirt kiya . ise b soch samj k jawab dena chahie tha ab kisi k jameer ko thes lagegi to wo badkega hi na , or yaha pe koi b aisa boy nhi hai jo kisi ladki pe bad word use karta ho agr aisa hota to admins uska commnt aproove nhi karta samja or rahi bat respect ki to jo respect k layak hota hai usiki respcet ki jati hai yaha or b girls hai , panchi , rashi , divya mgr koi is tarike se bat nhi karta jaise is alka ne pankaj se ki or finally ye ki pankaj ne jo b reply diya wo bilkl thik tha.

      1. pankaj says:

        yaar aki , mere baare me bura sunkar tujhe bura laga…mere liye yahi bahut hai..yaar tumsab mere sachche dost ho…aaj m samir ko bhi thanx kahna chahta hu kyuki uske chutiyape ki wajah se hi tum sabka pyaar dekhne ko mila mujhe….abe ab to chor do bechare samir ko , ab to khun bhi niklne laga uska..koi cottn laao yaaro… ;)

    2. pankaj says:

      dear samir..ab jab alka sorry bol chuki hai to tu kyu aag me ghee dal raha hai…baat ab khatm ho chuki hai..aur rahi baat girls ki respect ki to pamchhi , rashi, divya savita bhi girls hi hai aur meri achhi dost bhi..mujhe kisi aur se apne liye certificate lene ki zarurat nahi hai….meri had mujhe pata hai lekin saamne wale ki hadd usko samjhana bhi mujhe achchi tarah aata hai…alka samjh chuki hai , tu bhi samjh ja….filhal tera commnt alka ka chapter khatm hone baad aaya hai to achcha yahi hai baat yahi khatm ho jaaye..

    3. Raj Bindaas says:

      Samir – tujhse aisi umeed nhi thi be me janta hu tu bahut bada tharki hai lekin ek ladki wo v new users k liye tu apne purane frndz ko kaise bhul sakta hai, dekh samir jyada hoshiyar mat bano mujhe shak hai tu kya game khel rha hai….bt sunle ek bat kaan kholkr muje majbur mat kr fir se….

  11. Dhiraj says:

    @samir,..kya baat hai alka ki kaafi respect..kar raha hai….Dhiraj kya ladkio k peeche laat marta hai…tu chutiya ka chutiya hi rahega….tere maine kaafi comnts padhe hain…usme friendship ki nahi chutiyapanti ki boo aati hai….kyonki tere alawa yanha koi ladka chutiya nahi aata…yanha jitne bhi ladke aate hain…apni chutiyapan show nahi karte…..sirf tujhe chhodkar….tere mein kucch ek major problem hai…ek baat bata raha hoon agar tu jo koi bhi gf banaega woh teri iss chutiyapan ka fayada uthaegi…

    mere paas kis ladko ko kiss tarah ki ladki milegi uska accha kahasa supersense hai…
    maine apne kai brother k baare main iss sense ka use kiya tha jo..100 percent sach sabit hua..
    yanha mein apna kya duniya k kisi bhi ladke aur ladkio k jode k baare mein clear kar sakta hoon…
    tujhe kaise milegi..mein acchi tarah jaanta hoon…
    mujhe jay ki bhi feeling ka sense ho jata hai..
    jay ki g.f kaise hogi uska bhi andaza hai mujhe..
    yaa fhir kisi ka bhi..kyonki mere pass iska natural sense hai..
    aur bol de jo kucch bolna hai mujhe…kyonki tu mere baare main kya sochta hai woh bhi main acchi tarah janta hoon..
    tu dil ka accha hai but teri sabse badi kamjori yehi hai…samjha..

    @jay,..tumhe mujhse kucch jhooth bol dene chahiye the..but tum bhole the..phir bhi mere sense power se tumhara sach mere samne aata raha..
    @samir,galat react mat karna…and this is my last cmnt 4 u….GBU!!!

    1. Samir says:

      Abe lodu dhiraj
      tu to kuch jyada hi bolne lga h be,
      sale chutya tu h be tabhi to tu kabhi jay k luna k pichhe bhagta h,,aur 1 time tha jb tu punit mumbay aur ravi k pichhe bhagta tha,aur chillata tha oye hotnes k devta samir mujhe kamine aur ravi se bcha le hehehe
      aur sun be chutya maine tera nam ,wanted,kapil aur heartbeat m kyun nhi ad kya,,kyunki tu jyada girls se bat nhi krta h ishi liye,aur tu din bhar larkon se chipka rahta h
      aur darling tujhe lga m tujhe waise boys m ad kr rha hu,,jo bad word use krte hain,,bt tu galat soncha be lodu

      JPR

    2. pankaj says:

      hahahahaha abe yaar dhiraj …tune pahle nahi bataya apne is supersense ke baare me…
      yaar bata na mujhe kaisi ladki milegi yaa mili hai…m dekhna chahta hu tu kitna right sochta hai….aur yaar samir ko jane de….raat gayi baat gayi…aur jo ladki hi bhaag gayi ..ab uske baare me dil me kyaa mail rakhna….

    3. Matrix says:

      meri girlfriend kaisi hogi? :o

      1. AKI ( Jaiswal ) says:

        abe dhiraj bhai ,apne supersence ka use klark ye bata to yar ki muje milegi ya nahi milegi . hehe

  12. Dhiraj says:

    @jay..now i can feel ur heart is shifted somwhre…so mine too…but whre i dont knw..maybe its gods wish..GBU!!

  13. Dhiraj says:

    @jay..ek aur baat ab tumhari aur meri baate jada nahi ho paengi..

    1. Jay says:

      Q ????????????

  14. HT says:

    are yar HT hu bhul gaye kya. Ab bata v do kab W2H start hoga.

    1. Admin says:

      kuch kah nahi sakta roj roj ki bakchodi se pareshan aake mene band kar di

  15. Ratan Noora says:

    mujhe v english nahi aatiiiiiiii admn…….hahaha

  16. Addy says:

    Jokes yaar hindi mei likho but joke acha tha ..
    Alka ji ap pankaj ko chhodo mujse dosti karo mein kafi smart and soft spoken ladka hu…. Ap mujse dosti karogi na sirf dosti or kuch nai…

  17. Samir says:

    Oyeee rashhhi
    tu itni pyari baten mt kiya kr,warna mera dil tere pe aa jayega,jb tu hansti hai,to aisa lgta h jaise phul khil rhe hain,,
    yar tu kitni pyari baten krti h,,dil krta h tu sirf bolti rahe aur m teri churiyon si khanakti awaj sunta rhu aur m sonch rha hu tere ouper 1 cute sa poem likhun jo bilkul tere jaisa hi cute ho,,
    bt panchhy se dar lgta h,,

    JPR

    1. Rashii says:

      Samir jija ji humari itni tareef mt kijiye hume laaj aati hain hehehe

  18. Alka says:

    @sameer ji thks mere liye bolne ka but ap merey liy apni dosti mat karab karay mei to pk jaise ladko ko muh nahi lagati kyuki ise tarha k sadak chap gande ladke ganda aur sirf ganda hi sochte hai. Is tarah ladke apni maa behan ki ijat nahi karte toh hamari kya khak karenge. Is jaise ladko toh dekhte hi goli mar deni chaiye. But ham apse dosti jarur karenge…

    1. panchhy says:

      miss alka ye sb kiske liye likha h tne ab agr tmne hamare dost ko kuch b kaha to tu usko goli mare usse pehle ham tuje goli mar kr usi gandi sadak k gande nale me fenk dnge

      1. pankaj says:

        oye panchhi ko gussa aa gaya …ab alka ka murder ho jayega…koi to rok lo yaar…
        my dear panchhi tu iski baat dil pe naa le ye koi ladka hai jo yaha ka purana user hai..mujhse shayd kisi baat pe khunnas khaya hua hai…tu zyaada gussa na ho…tu hasti muskurati achhi lagti hai…gussa karne ke liye m hi bahut hu….hehehehe..tc

    2. pankaj says:

      bas ye aakhri baar hai…aaj ke baad tere kisi commnt me mera naam bhi aaye

    3. Admin says:

      Madam tere ko lat warning hai.. apni gandi juban sambhal ke bat kar.. agar meri sahanshakti ka pull toot gaya to bura hoga.

      aur ter eko jidhar bhi achhe log mile udhar jake baat karne ka…idhar aam ya kele nahi bant rahe jo tum idhar aayi thi..

      na kisi ne invite kiya tha na koi karega.. ana ho aa jana na aana ho mat aana.. par jab bhi bat karna usko samjbhal ke karna

    4. Raj Bindaas says:

      Alka g…namastey, me raj, aap mujhe nhi janti bt promise aaj k bad aap mujhe achi tarah se jan jayegi, ye aapki khuskismati thi jo mene abhi tak apka koi cmt nhi dekha waise me aapse ek bat puchna chahta hu aap mind mat kariyega, aapne hamare frnds ko sadak chap kaha ganda kaha, aap ek bat bataiye aap yaha kya karne aati thi….apni chut chudwane aati thi ya joke padhkar apni chut me ungali dalne…sali tu jise ganda bol rhi hai to tu v koi dudh ki dhuli nhi hai, tujhe itna tharak chadha hai to pankaj se lekar mann nhi bhara to mera lele suresh raina ki kasam 9″2 lamba aur mota ka wada hai ek bar jo legi zindagi bhar yaad rakhegi, aur sun tu jis samir ko yaad karna hai kar le, dekhta hu mera koun jhat ukhadta hai,

      note – is bar me manners se bat kiya hu, pura ijjat dekar agli bar ijjat lekar bat karunga

  19. Alka says:

    @kapil ji hum bcom kar rahe hai.

  20. Alka says:

    @Samjeer ji mei abi toh cmts nahi kar paungi kyoki mere exam shru hone wale hain par tab tak ke muje mat bhuliyega mei wapis cmts nahi karungi but 2months baad aakar 1 last cmt karugi jisme mei apko apna no jarur dungi aur apka no lekar jaungi kyuki mei apke batao se bahut impress hui hu aur apse milna chahti hu.. Tabtak ke liye pls pankaj ko meri taraf kuch b ulta sida mat bolne de. apki dost alka. Baki frds ko bye bye meri taraf se. Tc…

    1. pankaj says:

      ye achha hai …hahahahahaha ab tu jaa rahi hai to kyaa bolu ulta seedha…main to baat khatm karna chahta tha per tu hi agar khatam nahi karna chahti to teri marzi…

      1. pankaj says:

        abe admin tune mere commnt edit kar diye…hehehehe chal tune jo bhi kiya achcha kiya..yaar ..ab tension na le yaar..thodi galti meri bhi thi..m sorry bolta hu tujhe bhi aur apne baki dosto ko bhi…jinhe meri aur alka ki wajah se pareshani hui aur unka mood kharab hua…

  21. Rashii says:

    Heartbeat ji humara dil me koi bhi nhi hain ap bhi nhi :'(

    1. Heartbeat says:

      Hye barbi doll jan kar bohut dukh hua ke tum apne frnds ko dil se yaad nahi karti to tumne hum frnds ko dil se nikal kar kaha rakha hai.

  22. Rashii says:

    Nhi mile ap k sms fir se kijiye na nd apko ek serious baat bhi btani thi

    1. Admin says:

      tera number vo hi hai ya badal liya hai :( mene tujhe bade mssg kiye par koi b reply nahi kiya tune aur na hi tera number mill raha hai.. bhuhuhuhuhu call kar mujhko jaldi se

  23. pankaj says:

    m yaha ki sabhi ladkiyo se request karna chahta hu ke mere alka ko diye gaye commnts kripya na pade…m nahi chahta ke aap logo ko koi shock lage.ke is duniya me aise gande words bhi hote hai…aapka dost pankaj (janhit me jari…)

    1. AKI ( Jaiswal ) says:

      or jis ladki ne cmmnt pad liye wo kya karegi ha ???

      1. pankaj says:

        ye chetawni aage aane wale commnts ke liye hai bhai..abhi to m use tameez se hi samjha raha tha..hehe

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